I guess I should do an update. We're all doing okay right now. Things are hopefully turning around but I might not be blogging after today or tomorrow for a while. That won't necessarily mean I'm dead. That might just mean I don't have internet available. There are still plenty of unknowns about our immediate future. I think things are going to be much much better within a few days, but I've learned in the past not to count my chickens before they hatch. Until everything officially works out and is complete, I'll just keep cautiously hoping that things work out.
Eric is probably starting training for his promotion in about a week and a half. He'll get a pay raise while he's training (he'll still be getting hourly at that point) and a LOT of overtime each week. It's a good thing he won't be salary yet so he can take advantage of time-and-a-half! I actually think he'll be making (with time-and-a-half) about as much as he was expecting to make once he starts getting paid salary. Having him working so much will be enormously helpful financially, although it will also be enormously stressful for an exhausted pregnant mommy (me) who sometimes needs her hubby around to help her with things throughout the day. The training should last about 8 weeks and then he will start getting paid salary. I know this is a good thing. I just need to continue adjusting to being a SAHM. I find that when Eric is at work my days go so slow. I count the hours and minutes until he gets off work. I count the hours and minutes until Ricky goes to bed or until I can put him down for a nap so I can lay down and rest. I'm not used to being so alone. I think it has partially been so hard because I've been so stressed about where we're going to live and how we're going to survive that my brain never stops racing when he's not around to reassure me and distract me. But today I was doing laundry ALL DAY trying to catch up before we move and I felt like the day went faster than usual. I wasn't counting down the hours and minutes until Eric got off work today. In fact, when Eric texted his mom to let her know he was on his way home, I was surprised it was already time for him to come home. I think the secret to keep days from dragging is to clean (ugh, no fun) and keep busy.
The hard times we've been experiencing are a result of the lack of money we were experiencing when Eric was still job searching. Bills got too behind. We needed more money coming in. When he finally got his job and started making money it was too late to fix everything. So at least through our struggles we have the knowledge that the family is bringing in enough income to get by, we just need to move and start everything over fresh before we can actually get back on our feet. It's just absurd that we hit absolute rock bottom AFTER Eric started working and making money.
It's so scary moving when you're unsure how it's going to work out. I remember moving home from Tennessee to Pennsylvania. I have no doubt we made the right choice. I was so happy I cried when I saw the Welcome to Pennsylvania sign and vowed to never move away again. But it was terrifying making such a sudden decision (and without any money to support it) to move back and then rushing to get up here before we truly hit rock bottom. Eric's dad and stepmom generously drove all the way down to Tennessee with a truck so they could pack up our things and take them to PA, but we didn't go back at the same time as them. I forget why, to be honest, I think it was because we didn't have gas money yet and we didn't say goodbye to my mom yet (which we never did, sadly, because they got very sick and were sick for several weeks. We couldn't wait several weeks, we were running out of money for food.) But we lived for a while without any furniture or anything before we finally came back thanks to a very generous friend who gave us some gas money so we'd make it home. We slept on the floor on top of some comforters. I actually grew to love sleeping on the floor. I would have slept on the floor up here and ditched my bed if it weren't for having pets in our room and hard-wood-floors. Anyway I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we were scared. I was really worried about making it back up to PA safely and having a place to live. I woke up every morning feeling nervous and went to bed every night feeling terrified. But when the time came to move, we did it, and it went fine. We got to PA, moved in with Eric's mom, Ricky adjusted immediately, and we were able to relax for a while. The anticipation was worse than the actual event. Now that we're going through this hard time, I feel just as nervous and scared as I did that time, possibly even more. But maybe I'm just days away from being able to relax again. Maybe I'm just days away from waking up calm and going to sleep calm for a change.
I can't wait for things to be good again. A few months ago I was blogging about Eric's new job and listing the things I couldn't wait to do once we got money (go on a date, take Ricky out for ice cream, go for a drive) but now I'm just excited to have a permanent roof over my head, heat, hot water, and the freedom to stop worrying so much. I still want to go on a date, take Ricky out for ice cream, and go for a drive... but if I don't have a safe, warm, stable home to come back to, all those things are pointless.
Eric is probably starting training for his promotion in about a week and a half. He'll get a pay raise while he's training (he'll still be getting hourly at that point) and a LOT of overtime each week. It's a good thing he won't be salary yet so he can take advantage of time-and-a-half! I actually think he'll be making (with time-and-a-half) about as much as he was expecting to make once he starts getting paid salary. Having him working so much will be enormously helpful financially, although it will also be enormously stressful for an exhausted pregnant mommy (me) who sometimes needs her hubby around to help her with things throughout the day. The training should last about 8 weeks and then he will start getting paid salary. I know this is a good thing. I just need to continue adjusting to being a SAHM. I find that when Eric is at work my days go so slow. I count the hours and minutes until he gets off work. I count the hours and minutes until Ricky goes to bed or until I can put him down for a nap so I can lay down and rest. I'm not used to being so alone. I think it has partially been so hard because I've been so stressed about where we're going to live and how we're going to survive that my brain never stops racing when he's not around to reassure me and distract me. But today I was doing laundry ALL DAY trying to catch up before we move and I felt like the day went faster than usual. I wasn't counting down the hours and minutes until Eric got off work today. In fact, when Eric texted his mom to let her know he was on his way home, I was surprised it was already time for him to come home. I think the secret to keep days from dragging is to clean (ugh, no fun) and keep busy.
The hard times we've been experiencing are a result of the lack of money we were experiencing when Eric was still job searching. Bills got too behind. We needed more money coming in. When he finally got his job and started making money it was too late to fix everything. So at least through our struggles we have the knowledge that the family is bringing in enough income to get by, we just need to move and start everything over fresh before we can actually get back on our feet. It's just absurd that we hit absolute rock bottom AFTER Eric started working and making money.
It's so scary moving when you're unsure how it's going to work out. I remember moving home from Tennessee to Pennsylvania. I have no doubt we made the right choice. I was so happy I cried when I saw the Welcome to Pennsylvania sign and vowed to never move away again. But it was terrifying making such a sudden decision (and without any money to support it) to move back and then rushing to get up here before we truly hit rock bottom. Eric's dad and stepmom generously drove all the way down to Tennessee with a truck so they could pack up our things and take them to PA, but we didn't go back at the same time as them. I forget why, to be honest, I think it was because we didn't have gas money yet and we didn't say goodbye to my mom yet (which we never did, sadly, because they got very sick and were sick for several weeks. We couldn't wait several weeks, we were running out of money for food.) But we lived for a while without any furniture or anything before we finally came back thanks to a very generous friend who gave us some gas money so we'd make it home. We slept on the floor on top of some comforters. I actually grew to love sleeping on the floor. I would have slept on the floor up here and ditched my bed if it weren't for having pets in our room and hard-wood-floors. Anyway I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we were scared. I was really worried about making it back up to PA safely and having a place to live. I woke up every morning feeling nervous and went to bed every night feeling terrified. But when the time came to move, we did it, and it went fine. We got to PA, moved in with Eric's mom, Ricky adjusted immediately, and we were able to relax for a while. The anticipation was worse than the actual event. Now that we're going through this hard time, I feel just as nervous and scared as I did that time, possibly even more. But maybe I'm just days away from being able to relax again. Maybe I'm just days away from waking up calm and going to sleep calm for a change.
I can't wait for things to be good again. A few months ago I was blogging about Eric's new job and listing the things I couldn't wait to do once we got money (go on a date, take Ricky out for ice cream, go for a drive) but now I'm just excited to have a permanent roof over my head, heat, hot water, and the freedom to stop worrying so much. I still want to go on a date, take Ricky out for ice cream, and go for a drive... but if I don't have a safe, warm, stable home to come back to, all those things are pointless.
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