In February of 2007 Eric and I met each other in the Harrisburg York chat room on AOL. I had just gotten out of a serious relationship and he had just moved back home to Pennsylvania from Virginia. We started talking and I was shocked to find out that my first boyfriend Jared was his step-cousin in-law and I had his other cousin as a teacher. It's a small world. After that day we talked to each other every chance we got. We stayed up all night talking most nights and as soon as I got home from school every day I ran to the computer to see if he was on. Soon he was asking to meet me, but I was so incredibly shy and nervous to meet him that I hesitated. I was also worried because I was 18 and in my senior year of high school and he was 26! I thought my parents would kill me if I started dating someone that much older than me. For various reasons we stopped talking as frequently and eventually stopped talking at all.
I met another guy and quickly got involved in a serious relationship with him. We got an apartment together a few months after I graduated high school and he proposed to me on Christmas day. I said yes, but it wasn't long before I realized we weren't right for each other. I couldn't stand his quirks and apparently he couldn't stand mine either because he broke up with me on August 9, 2008. Ironically Eric got married on that day to Jenn. I was devastated about the break up, but mostly because I knew I'd have to find another place to live and I didn't have a good enough job to get my own apartment. I was scared. I started talking to Eric again because I finally had internet on my phone, and I missed talking to him. He did the best he could to comfort me through the hard time I was having. I moved back in with my mom temporarily and continued talking to Eric, but mostly through text messages.
On August 24 after I got home from church I texted Eric to see what he was up to, and he was at the park right up the street from my mom's house. He invited me to come spend the day with him and his wife. I wanted to say no because meeting people really makes me nervous, but I knew I had to meet him after all the help he'd given me the past few weeks. I could tell he was the kind of person I could be friends with forever and I didn't want to miss out on having a great friend like him in my life. After a long debate with myself I worked up the courage to go to the park.
The moment I met him I knew he was my soul mate. Not necessarily in a romantic way, since he was married to another woman at the time. But I knew we were meant to know each other. He became one of my best friends before we even spoke our first words to each other. We spent a few hours at the park, and while we were there we got a moment alone and he told me that things were going badly between him and his wife. I got the vibe that he really had no interest in her at all and regretted marrying her, but we didn't have time to talk about it. They invited me back to their house, and I decided to go with them. We had a pretty fun time. Jenn was pretty nice to me and I didn't dislike her, but I could tell she and Eric didn't love each other.
After I left their house that day Eric and I immediately started texting- even before I got home. We confessed that we were developing feelings for each other, and he told me how bad it really was between him and Jenn. He told me he'd only married her because he loved her kids, but that he realized it was a mistake.
Within 2 weeks of the day we met he left Jenn and moved back in with his mom, and we spent literally as much time as we possibly could together. I couldn't worry about his age or his marital status when he made me feel so good. I hardly slept at all, because every night we texted until I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. I spent countless nights being lulled to sleep by our song playing as his ringtone and the smell of his cologne. (He'd given me a bottle) This was the love of a lifetime.
We made our relationship official on September 9, 2008 and he filed for divorce soon after. He bought a car (he needed one after he left Jenn and I needed one after my break up also) and we shared it. I took it to work every day and then took him to work every night. I moved in with him when my mom moved to Tennessee in October and I quit my job because it was too far away for a daily commute. We spent countless nights (when he wasn't working) just driving around. We got lost on purpose and stayed out all night exploring everything. We didn't have a care in the world. He taught me to explore and how to be truly spontaneous. We spent too much money, made mistakes, but we didn't care because all we could think about was our new love.
I got pregnant about 7 months after we started dating and we were ecstatic. We'd been talking about marriage since the day we fell in love, but we felt like now would be a wonderful time. We set a date for September 30, 2009 and that's the day Eric and I said our vows. The wedding wasn't fancy- it was in a court house in Red Lion, PA. Eric's mom, my dad, my dad's girlfriend Cheryl, our friend Chris, and my best friend Amanda were all there to witness our special day. We were lucky enough to have our little man present (in my belly). He was our favorite guest.
And now on our 1 year wedding anniversary, I am excited to reflect on our marriage so far. Since we've been together for 2 years now I can describe the dynamics of our relationship without being biased by the intoxication of new love. Our love isn't exciting anymore. It's not overwhelming all the time, and it's not perfect. But Eric is my best friend. He's my partner in life. Everything I do every day is something I can share with him, and the comfort that brings me is huge. Life is infinitely more meaningful when you share it with someone who is truly interested in the little things you experience every day. It's been a wonderful marriage with a lot of happy events. I never felt closer to Eric than I did on the day our son was born. He was such a support to me and I don't know how I could have handled any of it without him by my side.
He is such a loyal husband. He calls me the minute he gets off work every day and he comes straight home with a big hug for me. I never wonder if he's out there cheating on me because he is always so excited to see me and our son whenever he's not home. He is genuinely interested in things that interest me. One of his favorite things to do with me is take me shopping for yarn. He doesn't sit in the car or pace around while I'm looking at yarn, but he joins me and points out the colors he likes and he offers to buy me everything I say I like. I never could have asked for so much support from him!
He has never yelled at me during a fight or called me names. He doesn't swear at me. When we have fights he tries his hardest to resolve them as soon and peacefully as possible and make me happy again. I am really happy with the way we handle our disagreements. I think it's so important for the health of a relationship not to be mean to each other during a fight.
All in all, I have to say that Eric is a wonderful husband and father. He seems to be a rare breed of man who values love and family above all other things and he's one of the most selfless people I've ever met. 50 years from now, provided we're both still alive, our relationship will probably not be very romantic. I doubt we'll spend every day holding hands and making goo goo eyes at each other as we stroll through the park. I doubt we'll spend every evening slow dancing on the beach and watching the sunset. But that's okay. At that point in our lives we probably won't need constant romance in order to enjoy each other. What's most important is that the companionship we share now will only be strengthened by the passing of the years and we'll always have someone to talk to who truly cares what we have to say.
Happy anniversary Eric. I can't wait for the rest of our life together.
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